Thursday May 27, 2010

Man I'm tired.  It's either that this boy is growing and taking up all my energy (which I can tell he's growing because I'm huge) or I'm just being too lazy and it's causing a lack of energy.  I think it's a combination of both.  I was pretty productive yesterday and had a good day with Robert being home for his day off.  We enjoyed our ultrasound appointment- well Baily and I did (Robert was dealing with a very cranky Joaquin who did not want to hold still).  We found out we are having a boy!  I was very surprised because I was sure it was a girl but I'm still excited and grateful that he seems to be healthy.  He was very active and the tech had a hard time getting his heart measurements because he wouldn't hold still.  Looks like another crazy boy!  Baily was a little bummed at first but then she just said "Mom, it's ok.  I will still love him."  It was so sweet.  She was being so sweet throughout the appointment holding my hand and asking questions and checking to make sure I was alright.  Even though I kept telling her it didn't hurt I think she was still worried about me because she kept doing all she could to comfort me like rubbing my hand and saying "It's ok mom.  I love you mom.  Your my best mom ever mom."  She's so sweet.  I just love that girl so much.  After our appointment we rushed home and I finished prepping dinner and then the missionaries came to eat dinner with us.  They seem like sweet guys.  After we ate we had to do family prayer and scriptures since I had to go to Mutual and wouldn't be home before the kids went to bed.  It felt good having them Elders join us and knowing we weren't doing it just to put on a show for them.  I was late to Mutual because I got a call from one of our YW- April, asking me if I would give her a ride.  I was thrilled to since I feel close to her and know that she needs all the support she can get.  On the way to pick her up the drive was so beautiful.  I had the windows open and since it had just rained everything was so green and beautiful.  Then one of my most favorite songs came on the radio from my ipod- EFY's "I Know That My Redeemer Lives."  I felt the Spirit so strongly and felt so grateful for this beautiful earth we live in, for my Savior and my testimony of Him and just for my life.  Mutual was great.  It was great to be back after not having gone for such a long time.  I so love my calling and I love my girls.  We made cute little flag pins for our Veterans for our Ward Memorial Day breakfast.  It was simple but fun.  After that I gave April a ride home and came home.  I was exhausted after that but I remember after saying my prayers and hopping into bed I just felt a great warmth inside and having the impression that Heavenly Father was telling me how much He loves me, how proud He is of me in my progress these past few weeks and that He has forgiven me of my sins I've been working so hard to repent of.  It was amazing and a feeling I won't ever forget.  How grateful I am for the Atonement and for repentance and to know that my Heavenly Father loves me.  How grateful I am for Divine communication.  So yesterday was a really great day.  Today there was not a lot going on.  Baily had Amber over to play and they had fun.  They had a few little spats here and there and I was a grump which I was not happy about and not sure why- must because I was being so lazy and unproductive with playing Solitaire too much.  I seriously need to work on that.  I did finally get a letter out to my mom which is a big burden of guilt lifted off my shoulders.  I love my mom so much and feel so bad that I'm not very diligent about writing her.  So it felt good to get a letter out to her.  When it came time to take Amber home, we stopped by my dad's to say hi but he was kinda grumpy with my kids so we didn't stay long.  We did stay outside for a couple of hours and the kids had a good time.  I should have been a better mom and played with them more and paid more attention to them instead of reading my magazine the whole time.  It was the New Era but really, my time would have been better spent giving my kids the love and attention they deserve.  I really need to work on that too.  And I will.  Now I'm gonna go pray and go to sleep because I'm beat.  Tomorrow should be a fun day- we are going to a bbq in the evening at Sis. Rebarchik's with other YW friends and then it's fireworks (it's chocolatefest in Burlington this weekend).  Baily and I are so excited about the fireworks.  Robert's off for the whole weekend and even Monday so we are looking forward to a family, fun-filled Memorial Day weekend.  My life is so blessed:)